This is without a doubt the stupidest plan you've ever had
by sunokasai
Summary: What do you do if you have four really dense friends, four desperate friends needing help with your dense ones and one girlfriend, who somehow is your personal ticket to hell? Will you be the devils right hand or play save? Mentioned: NozoEli, NicoMaki, KotoUmi, TsubaHono, RinPana


**Author's Note: I really don't know, all I wanted was a short ficlet, now you're blessed with ~1600 words. I don't know what happened I have no words to say about this half cracked scenario… just enjoy.**

 **Break**

If it weren't for the person standing right in front of her, Eri would have already turned around and left. In fact, if it weren't for that person she would never even consider something like this. Thinking about it, when did she even start to like such ideas. Well, she knew the answer. But it was still unbelievable. And the rational part of her brain told her, screamed, not to to it.

But no, her gorgeous girlfriend with her adorable smile and those mischievous glare in her beautiful green eyes did it yet again. And Eri knew she would regret the following sentence rather quickly.

"This is without a doubt the stupidest plan you've ever had. Of course I'm in."

* * *

"This is without a doubt the stupidest plan she's ever had. Why the hell did I say I would be in?" Sitting in the clubroom, Eri laid her head down on the table and groaned. No matter how this would end, Nozomi owed her. Big time.

"Why did you call us here?" Getting impatient, Umi crossed her arms in front of her chest, eyes closed.

"Can we get this over with? You know I still have to compose our next song." To Umi's right, Maki twirled some of her red looks, pretending to be as nonchalant as always. But to Eri, she failed miserably, her confusion evident in her voice.

"Why do we have to skip practice?"

"Yeah! Why, nya?"

Honoka and Rin, sitting opposite to Umi and Maki were more bothered over the fact that Eri had cancelled practice. Either they just didn't care about the whole situation or just needed time to waste their energy, Eri didn't know.

"First of all," Eri started "I am as annoyed as you are. I would rather practice than spending my time with this."

"What do you mean with 'this'?" Maki raised an eyebrow. Umi was getting more curious as well, eyeing Eri with suspicion. Honoka and Rin on the other hand were eager to know the truth or whatever the blonde was going to reveal. If it was important enough to cancel practice it surely was a great deal.

"Basically… 'This' can be translated with 'You'" Leaning back in her chair, Eri looked at the other girls. When they didn't say a word, she continued. "It came to our attention that the four of you have some… let's call it 'problems', you are not able to solve yourselves because of… certain circumstances involving… well… yourselves."

By now, Rin and Honoka had shut down, their brains not able to comprehend what the quarter russian wanted to tell them. Umi and Maki on the other hand glared daggers at Eri, knowing exactly what the blonde just implied with her last sentence and who else was involved.

"That being said…" Eri stood up and walked around the table to be as near to the door as possible. She made sure she had the key in her pocket while explaining further. "We decided on some not so drastic measures." Unbeknownst to the other four members of muse, Eri thought of these measures to be way to drastic. But she wasn't in the position to judge. Well, she was. But she had agreed to it. She had no choice.

Her hand made contact with the door knob. "We hope you'll enjoy your stay. May come realization upon you as fast as possible." With that, Eri threw the door open and exited in a matter of a second, closing the door. The only sound the others could hear was how Eri locked the room.

"What the hell!? Eri, get your ass back in here!" Maki was the first to stand up, knocking at the door furiously.

Honoka and Rin still didn't know what happened.

"Eri?" Umi… was calm. And Maki, Rin and Honoka backed away when they felt the dark aura emitting from the blue haired archer. Even Eri could feel it, and she stood outside. "I know you hear me and I know you fear for your life right now. If you open the door now, I make sure Nozomi will see you again in one piece."

Eri thought about it for a moment. What was worse? Facing the wrath of Sonoda Umi, dying in the process or having Nozomi not talking to her for a month? Then again, there was still Kotori. If Umi would be a kitten, Kotori would be the never ending stock of catnip to keep this cat calm and collected.

"Not going to happen. Sorry Umi." Walking away, Eri mailed Nozomi that the four dense members of muse were ready to face their enlightenment.

* * *

"What the hell are we doing here?" With nothing left to do, Maki twirled her hair. Her left bangs were already perfect curls and right now she was working on her right ones.

Honoka and Rin half laid on the table, trying not to fall asleep while Umi just sit there, doing nothing.

Another ten minutes passed before something turned on and Nico's voice filled the room.

"Nico-chan?" Maki looked around the room but couldn't find anything. All the while, Nico could be heard.

"What are we doing here? The great Nico-nii won't waste her time." She paused for a moment. "Look, I know we know each other for years now. You should know that-"

What followed made Maki's heart stop. There was another voice. The voice of another boy. "I know that, Yazawa-san. And you know that I am your biggest fan. And… I just can't do this anymore."

Wide eyed, Maki followed the conversation while the other three girls just looked confused and concerned in her direction.

"Yazawa-san, please go out on a date with me. I love you. I always did!"

"That's….. of course!"

"NOOOOOO!" Maki leaped onto the window, trying to see something outside. But there was nothing. Sliding down onto the floor, she leaned her back against the wall. "Nico…. chan."

When Umi wanted to stand up to comfort her friend, Kotori's voice filled the clubroom, leaving them paralysed. Apparently, she was talking with her mother.

"He gave me another chance?" Kotori's voice was excited. She seemed happy.

"Yes. He wants you to fly over as soon as possible. With the already scheduled live the next best possibility would be…"

"Right after the performance." Finishing the sentence of her mother, there were hands clapping. "I thought I lost my chance." The grey haired girl sighed. "But… I still can do it! I need to go home and start packing already!"

With that, Kotori's voiced vanished, leaving Honoka and especially Umi in a daze. The latter sat back on her chair, her arms hanging loosely at her sides, eyes downcast.

Before Honoka could say something, there was another voice. A man. "Kira-san, what do you think of the leader of Muse, Kousaka Honoka."

Instantly recognizing her name and Tsubasa's, Honoka listened carefully when Tsubasa answered. "You know… Muse are our rivals. But their still far away from us. Regarding their 'leader'…" Tsubasa pronounced this word rather strangely. "Their leader is just like a child. Over-active, not responsible… When I told her we respected her… Her face was priceless."

"W-What?" Dumbfounded, Honoka dropped down on her knees, tears gathering in her eyes.

By now, Rin didn't know what to do. Her friends all seemed broken but she couldn't take care of all of them. When she was about to say something, the missing voice filled the air.

"Making onigiri sure is relaxing." Hanayo hummed satisfied. "They are, for sure, my best friends." And then the voice stopped.

"Kayo-chin?" Looking disappointed, Rin sat down.

After another ten minutes of silence, Umi was the first one to talk. "I loved her, you know?" Tears were streaming down her face. "I loved her and I thought she would at least cherish our friendship. But no, after I ruined her first chance of becoming a designer… I thought… I thought she loved me, too."

"We're the same." Maki's defeated voice rang from across the room. "I… Even though we argue a lot. Even though she is a pain in the butt… And even though I always told myself that I couldn't possibly feel something like that… I… I loved this stupid stupid idol!" She threw something against the wall. She didn't care any more. She had lost her chance.

"Funny…" Honoka chuckled, although it was broken. "We all fell for someone, hm?" She forced a smile. "Tsubasa-san…. seemed so nice." With that she started sobbing.

Rin looked into her lap. "I don't know… I like Kayo-chin. She is cute. Whenever I'm around her, I feel good and save."

The other three smiled upon this innocent revelation. But the smile didn't last long before each of them gave in into their despair.

Neither noticed how the door opened again and the four reasons for their distress entered, walking up to their respective crushes. Upon hearing their confessions, they also had started to cry.

Outside of the clubroom were Eri and Nozomi, smiling.

"You know we will have to hide and that we won't be able to attend school for a couple of days? Otherwise Maki and Umi are going to kill us. Or me. Because I played along. They wouldn't dare to lay a hand on the groping master." Eri looked at the purple haired girl in her arms.

"Don't worry, Erichi. Your under my personal protection."

They shared a quick kiss before deciding to leave their friends alone.

* * *

A couple of days later, Eri had been cornered by Umi and Maki with Honoka and Rin in the background. Apparently their new girlfriends made sure that Eri's girlfriend was occupied for the next couple of hours.

BREAK

 **Author's Note:**

 **I know that some of you may be waiting for the new chapter of "Moon, Star and Sorrow". As I said on my Tumblr, this fiction is put on-hold for now. I'll quote what I explained then:**

 _"As you may know, I "suffer" from a terrible writers block regarding this particular fic. I have ideas how to display what possibly could happen next, but I am not satisfied with them. Therefore, continung the story with these would result in me being disappointed in my own fanfiction. And how can I hope for you to like it if I have doubts?_

 _Taking the advice from a friend I will stop for now._

 _This will not be the end, of course (since I have a draft of the climax already on my computer). I will try to order my thoughts, take a notebook and write some drafts. I will produce some ficlets to keep my inspiration flowing (if you want to help me with that by sending in asks…. I would appreciate it). And I'll hope that I can end "Moon, Star and Sorrow" the way it deserves."_

 **You'll see, I'll finish it. So don't worry.**

 **See you soon. :)**


End file.
